Monday, January 05, 2009

Weekend.... Persistence.... Perseverence... Journey of Life

.....Here I come again.... The previous weekend was indeed a great one in the last couple of years at least as far as the self's remembrance goes... The weekend usually goes off idling away to glory doing nothing beneficial.....catching up with friends, acquaintances, strangers, so on and so forth. The weekend passes by usually with above mentioned humans in having a cuppa coffee, seldom, often imbibing into the liquid diet. Generically can be termed as worthless time spent with no motive or objectives. Else it just is total idle of time doing nothing at all rotting like a vegetable unused, unsavoured.
But the weekend just passed by has shown me great deal of what life has to offer. It started off with a lazy note on the saturday morning. Thanks to the liquid diet that the self was on, on the friday night. For once it all went as planned on the saturday afternoon. We caught up to play cricket which we have not done in quite a while. K, N, R, P and the self induldged ourselves in a few games of cricket. Thought not physically stressed by the game but immensely releived of a guilt that we had not sweat in quite some time. Yes, ofcourse, though the self and the others except for N did not run around much, we still felt that our strokes are pretty much there. We still had a great deal of straight bat. We still possesed some fine leg glances. We could still turn the ball quite a bit. We had all that excitement and passed comments, sledged each other jovially as the spirit of the game grew. "Its over...its all over for him","yup...pitch it right there and he would offer a regulation catch".... so on and so forth. In all it was a very decent effort seen through till a good end.
Then came a part of the day when the self saw quite a deal of what life has to offer. R, N and the self caught up for a while at one of the reggular hangouts. This was by far for me one of those conversations that we have had in the recent times which was totally abstained from pure non sense and gibberish that we speak every other time. N spoke brilliantly, R and the self counter argued and agreed to disagree on a few things, but agreed to most of it.
We talked about how we push ourselves to get what we need in life. N uttered a concept of "Point of No Return". It simply means to an extent a human feels that he cant push himself/herself any more. It also means that, so far this feet has been acheived and there is a lot more to cover, while you just rest for a moment and think, let go ahead. It also means, that this feet has been achieved, I will come back later to cover the rest.
We talked about things that do not yield upon touching base with the point of no return, hence we most often step back and decide to come back for it once again..... Lest there is another aspect to it. I will persist, just stay there , stand still, I shall not wither, I shall make myself a synony for persistence. Persistence is what as they say brings out the mettle in a human. Persistence as the self sees is the first step the journey called Perseverence. Hence as the old chinese proverb goes " A journey of thousand miles starts with a single step" , persistence is a small single step. Lest it just makes the human robust and strengthen him through the journey of perseverence.
These things when he spoke, came as a realisation to me. The self looked at the self and questioned in amazement. Have I not stood there? Have I not waited? Did I wither?Did I step back? Did I reconsider? Did I think about coming back later? I never ever realised that I was standing on my point of no return. That conversation dint hin to me, that I actually have a point of no return. What N spoke was absolutely logical but, for me I believe there is no point of no return...... I believe Point of no return is in the process of looking and working forward towards a definite destination. But what i've chosen is not a destination, its a journey.... if used as a management jargon, its not a project, it an operation. This journey of happiness that I want step on and tread the unbeaten path has its destination only at a place called "Bliss" . Is that all about this journey? Very ambigously, strangely and extremely surprisingly, but with extreme pleasure I see this destination is not a place where I can stop myself and look back and say i've achieved a feet. Lest, this destination in itself is a journey towards eternity. Its a journey that doesnt have a destination. Lest it offers you all the fruits and blessings of a destination through out the journey.
This is just what I call a perfect paradox that life has to offer me. "The destination which is a journey" . Its so true that, this journey wouldnt be present, this destination wouldnt exist for if do not have the need for "LIFE". Most of it all, this is a beautiful persistence and an excellent perseverence - a journey that I am desperate to begin.


Sunday, September 21, 2008

A Writers Diary....

........back again... feels actually good... this place is quite a placation for the restless mind which has innumerable thoughts to put up with..... on friday said to the self.... blog a day will be the mantra for a sometime to come. A blog had usually come up in the past only when an itch had started to scribble down something for the self. More often it used be an impulsive blogging kind of an activity, which in the future tending to have an intention of being more of a compulsive blogging. I often wonder there is something that I have lost as a writer in the journey so far. I wish to contradict myself here again. I started off trying to wash away the itch of a restless mind a couple of years ago when I had the self up through the night. No I wasnt an insomniac. I sacrificed being in the arms of a beautiful angel while catering to customers of a certain company residing elsewhere where the sun rises as sun set in the part of the world where I prove my existence. I worked for an international customer service contact center to support my existence. It used to be a way to vent out the frustrations of life at the end of the day while for most of the normal homosapiens around me started the day. Well, ofcourse i dont deny a bit of it that I've graduated to quite a few levels in writing. I very well acknowledge with myself the fact that I do not ususally scribble for else to read and comment or come to a consensus regarding the views I have towards life or the way I visualises life. An unusal write up which doesnt seem inane to the world around would be shared with a few for whom being sensible is just a state of mind with impeccable relavance.
The initial ramblings of the self used to congregation of two languages though inane most of the times but still would be in congruence with the thoughts let to flow. A graduation I witness is by condescending to be more unilingual and developing a planned strategy and executing the same of honing the way the ramblings are to be scribbled on this personal space of mine. Should I actually call it an ascendance in an inane articulataion of thoughts? Well, I do admit that it makes self quite impressed looking at the levels of ascendence or condescence, just for it comes as a fact of life that there is a constant upgradation in one certain aspect of being and hanging around.
I aspire to get better and better with every write up going forward, No it is not to prove a point to any other fellow being, but its a genuine appreciation of the selfs improvisation in the diligence of achievement of a constant betterment.
A few fellow dwellers on the face of Terra Firma do interact with the self on the matter of write ups that the self does seldom than often. These dwellers are quite some bloggers themselves whom the self appreciates as writers. Often conceived by the compatriots of this sanct place or should I say perceieved? as a quite a serious blogger or a heavy writer. True, it is to quite an extent that most often I visit and scribble on this wall when the frustration of existence turns to an itch. Seldom, it is an itch of an idea or a thought flow that comes out as an incidence of a rambling while passing through a pleasant state of being. But I do beg to agree with the fact that writing or reading is a perfect food for thought, which not being present will make a human defintely anorexic in the context of intellect which will only lead to the peril of living and create room for mere existence of mediocricity. The self never than seldom has exploited the art of scribbling day to day mundane happenings of life. Ofcourse, I dont even in the remotest of dreams either deny that they are fun filled, thought provoking or even situations that cater to minute celebrations as compared to the magnitude of the highest order of life. The self on contemplation only converges to a point that it could be only due to the fact that the self is a visitor here seldom than often. I must admit that a few blog rolls that the self follows religiously is filled quite in excess of incidences of daliy sustenance which brings out a lot of excitement, sarcasm, cynicism, helplessness, mockery, appreciation, adulation, oppression, pride, amusement, threshold of enjoyment, threshhold of happiness, depth of frustration, abyss of anger, heights of disagreement and many more umpteen number of such daily expressions which actually makes up this wonderful phenomenon called life. It is not really a reason that such writing of the self causes any kind of a depression, it is just a feeling or a thought that can keep the self more cheerful by incorporating such incidences of life either intending a pun at the incidences or by encompassing them in a divine armour called humour. Should I call it an artistry a few compatriots possess that the self doesnt?
I often feel that I do write better, to an extent while I could pronounce to the world out there that I can write at least a 150% better than I do speak. It may be for the fact that I do get more time to think while I write and speech or a conversation is absolutely instantaneous instinct. I can sound contradictory at times saying and believing that I do not look up to many people around or who had been, while I aspire to speak some day this language that I write in impeccably like a few who live around in the same part of the world as I do. It is defeinitely not a point that I would deny that my writing qualifies to be creme de la creme, quite often it is subjected to being banal and cliched. An instance can be witnessed just by observing the title of this roll. I hope my mantra for the near future is going to be in function and doesnt go defunct "a blog a day... keeps idling away". On this note I sign off.


Friday, September 19, 2008

The Living

..... Off late the existence of human race on this part of Mother Earth has been and is being a witness to incidences that tend to cease the existence of the race itself. An evil thy name terror is playing the protagonist on the stage set for living. Massacre, blood shed, damages, artificial catastrophe, name thus what one wants as is claiming the lives of innocent humans. The land once known for peace and prosperity is now a victim of terror and anguish all along. Being witness to such occurrences causes an alarming disturbance of every commoner of the society who is already bearing their own turmoils of mundane life. Do we wonder actually what the reason is?
There can be umpteen number of excuses that can be put forth by the cult of terror as reasons. Do they stand a chance in placating the victim in the best sense of logic? While I wonder, the reason for such disturbances, it really is not only in this part of the world that human race is going through such inhumane sacrifices. Logically thinking, is it not just the intolerance of one human towards the other? Racism, fundamentalism, castism, what not.... but it connotes only intolerance.
It is but obvious to be an evidence of such inhuman acts. Retreading back on the path of human living it has been an evolution though but in a manner that has been quite offensive to the entire race. If one looks at the way things have evolved over aeons it has been one sect of humans intervening with another sect, which may have been a welcome act. After all the supreme being himself pronounces that world is one large family. But is this really true? Ofcourse not. There exists an element of being secular as a nation harbouring demographics of various sects. Alas ! it just fails to bring in the element called Harmony along. If a sect of people residing in a geographical location tend to be secular and offer space and living for another sect of humans, then doesnt it become the natural gesture of humans harboured to behave in a manner alike "being a roman in rome". Contradictorily, it so happens that such harbouring caters to give way for oppression. Result is a revolt. Destruction of human race.
Looking back at the past in the recent centuries to recent daces to recent years and a past few days, its only intolerance that has got into the mind of Terror sub counsciously or consciously that is playing a part in plying human souls to a world above and the carriers of such souls to a world beneath us. We name it aparthied, jihad, caste segregation and what not. Have we ever wondered what is the cause for such behaviour. Has tolerance led to intolerance? What ever happened to the ethos with which it was created and destined to live in peace and tranquility only to enrich Mother Earths presence in the universe which remains unmatched from a time unknown.
Every geographical demarcation as man evolved towards being civilised has welcomed beings from a seperate demarcation to only enrich the living, to grow together as humans to reach a state of being the epitome of knowledge in state synonym only for Harmony and Bliss though unintentionally. Alas! it has never been conceived to be so. What is such accomodation or universal brotherhood catering to? Conversions, Opression, Fundamentalism, Hatred , eternal dither. Should we advocate the fact that we shouldnt believe in being a global citizen and restrict ourselves to our community? Is that going to be a vital factor that is going to bring back the existence and stop the extinction of the species that we all belong to?
To be utmost honest, while I scribble I would not even in my dreams count on myself to be tolerant towards the homo sapiens out there who are not of my color, caste, creed, nationality et al even at the levels of mediocricity leave alone being the epitome of it. But I aspire to be more tolerant in the coming years of my living on Mother Earth. We need to remember one aspect, that no human is more powerful than the Mother Nature. One whip of anger by her knows no boundaries of demolition of being. Do we need to cause more harm to our fellow beings yet?
Lets obliterate the dogmas of the past and head towards a much more peaceful world with an open mind and a different view. Lets make this yet again "Vasudhaiva Kutumbakam" - One large Family


Wednesday, September 03, 2008

Just another inane thought....

..... It is the day of the "God of the Elephants". Yes it is the fourth day of the brighter fortnight in the sixth month of the Hindu Lunar almanac. Bhaadrapada Shukla Chaturthi. This God of elephants is inarguably one of the most beautiful gods worshiped in Hindu. A huge body of a man with trademark pot belly which later goes on to become a simily for all the obese individuals. Another name so attached to this God of Elephants - Lambodara - which essentially means the one who has a possession of a big belly. Lamba means closely humongous while Udara means the belly essentially meaning the creature called Lambodara. Just a few days back I was contemplating on the way of Hindu emphasis on the mundane existences of life and mother earth.
There is a story attached to how this God of anti interruptions to any work assumed to be carried in the world was begun to be worshiped by lesser demigods and lesser mortals. Apparently this God whom I personally like to address as Ganapatus can also be called as Gowri Manasa Putra which essentially means that he is a mentally conceived offspring of higher goddess. This offspring was stationed at the door while the mother divine prepared for her ablutions. Enter, the Father divine Lord Shiva who is connoted as the lord of Laya, the God of destruction of the universe when the dooms day occurs as described by the Hindu. The father divine seeks the way in to the abode, upon refusals and denials by the son, the father known for his anger and destructive powers bestowed upon him as being one of the supreme gods called the the Trimurti beheads the son in the fit of rage to let live the son head less and life less. Upon the return of the mother divine to witness the fall of the son, wept in grief, unbearable to the god of end to see the beloved wife in grief and pain, sent his men who are called the Ganas in all directions to find if there was any being who posted the head towards the north and asleep in state. However, the Ganas did find and beheaded the being who dwelt in the state of sleep posting the head towards the north. Alas !!! it was the head of an elephant. Since the father divine had disrupted the aesthetic beauty of the son befitting the head of an elephant awarded the foremost worship to be offered to the son before any one. Thats the story so far. Thinking and linking back to the contemplation of the self I wondered why the Hindu portrays gods with the head of an animal or something else.
Here we can witness Ganapatus, Narasimha (Human Body with the head of a lion), Hayavadana(Human headed by a horse) and so on. Also we can find umpteen number of instances where the gods of Hindu have a lot of animals as their vehicles or should I just refer to it as medium of transit or commutation. There have been umpteen number species that Terra Firma sports that are associated with various gods of the Hindu. There have been lions, tigers, bulls, rodents, peacocks and so on and so forth that are associated with the gods as their medium of transit. India being a land with umpteen number beliefs by the lesser mortals who comprise can be said in other words that the nation has been made up of. There are beliefs attached with a whole lot species. For instance down south it is believe that when a lizard extends a sound of a mating call it is believed that the words spoken by human at that instance is the truth. Fair enough to be discarded as a superstition. Treading back in contemplation the self found quite a lot of reasoning can be found to such aspects of life, I wouldnt be able to term them as the facts of life though since a lot of herd in the world consider that bit to be mythologically fabricated fables. However there is a lot sense that Hindu can attach with such association of species with the Gods or the association of species with way of life kind of beliefs. The Hindu emphasizes the importance of every living species on the face of earth. This is what the logic I came up with when I questioned the self. There are innumerous such instances that one can stumble upon as he or she treads the path of Indian mysticism. The ancient generation of Hindu was probably was way forward than the current generation in relevance to the thoughts of bestowing the importance to every aspect of mundane life to make it more excited, in the sense that something to be cautious of, some things to be celebrated with gay abandon, some things to be neglected or abandoned, somethings to just celebrate life and triumph.
Superstitions as well as I think was just instituted into the normal lives just to bring about the existence of umpteen number of creatures that exist here on Mother Earth. Beliefs to be believed in order to impart prominence to other beings and not alone the homosapiens.
They probably believed in the phrase that was delivered by the omni potent super being "Vasudhaiva Kutumbakam" to an extent that they included all the species residing around them to be a part of one big family and believed in being so..... hopefully the current generation also would move forward in the direction that is similar to a path when treaded back to the history of man kind.


Thursday, August 21, 2008

Good Riddance

... Its been some time since I came back here. I wouldnt give myself an excuse that being busy in mundane activities kept me away from this most personal space of mine. It has been an itch over a last few days that I said something to this most personal friend of mine. Ultimately I am back here to scratch the itch off.
Good Riddance - thought not the right term that I could use, alas! I dont find a better one at the moment. Those couple of words mean something this - "An expression of pleasure on being rid of some annoyance - usually an individual." However I wouldnt claim that I've gotten over a period of annoyance because it was something that I always treasured to have against my name. Yes, this is my quite well earned post graduate degree. It brings out something that I've always recapitulated looking back in time, yet another display of defiance. I take quite a pride in achieving this feet in the journey of life. I treasure thee for the reason that I have just crossed all hurdles that came my way and clinging on to it tenaciously until I finished the race.
Yesterday was officially the last day when most of my compatriots and contenders in the race met for one last time. It was time for some nostalgia to spurt. I wonder yet if I would be still associated with the race that I have finished ever in a longer race called Life. Yesterday it was the day when most of my compatriots and contenders met for one final time at my alma mater. Nostalgia was the word of the moment. Emotions ran high. I have cherished every moment over the last couple of years. I wouldnt beat the point that I sailed all alone through the voyage. There were these men and women who were also very instrumental in rowing my boat to the shore.
The two years that just went past by have seen some vivid things in life, some horrible, some cherishable, some forgettable, some unforgettable. These two years have earned some friends for life. As they say "Till the Grave".
I see a life apart from this post grad degree. This was the question my that sprung up from no where in the grave of the night after yet another conversation over the phone. Is this what I always wanted to do? I see a life out there with umpteen number of interesting things and concepts that a man live a life time and not just exist.
I hope I can live that life and not just exist.

Good Riddance

Saturday, June 28, 2008

Age or Ageless

..... For quite a while off late I have been thinking about this concept called Age. For one I relate this concept to that same most trivial aspect of what is called as Life as brought about by far one of the most revered Philosophical entity who lived in this great country called Jiddu Krishnamurthy. That concept that I see a relevance with age is Time.
Can we call age to be subset of time? How is that we can define age as? what is age as a noun? Well here it becomes so very ambiguous and I find myself discombobulated with the whole thing. Is growing old is what you call Age? Or is that phenomenon of some accomplishment that has been carried out through one's life? Or is that duration of time that has been invested in this accomplishment? Yet again I find myself lost... it seems a whole lot of entanglement, overlap and chaos.
What is your age? The common notion or if I wish to call it as the response to stimuli in the society that I exist in would be " How old is this person?" who is in the context of being asked the question. The observation of the self is that not even in the sub conscious mind of the questioner there would be a thought "what is your achievement?"
An achievement or an accomplishment is actually irrelevant to the fact there is age is attached to it by commoners. So, ladies and gentlemen, this yet beautiful world of our's have seen flashes of lives as brilliant and as eye hurting as it happened during the "Fatboy" explosion at Hiroshima on the 6th of August, circa 1945 . Short lived flash....... eternal impact on the human race.
Here are men and women the world has witnessed who have lived for just a few years but they have impacted this very world to the eternity. "Che" lived only 39 years. What a life that was!!! Oh boy he till date is branded as the brightest spark of revolution that the world has seen and so shall he be till the world sees the doomsday. I wonder if ever anyone has questioned Che what's your age mate? But then I can vouch for the fact that nobody ever probably dared to put forth that question to the " Jim Morrison". He lived only as a stint.... 27 years. He was what one can call a Free Radical human star. What has he not done in life?? He got married too? He died when he was 27..... He lived there on eternally.... There are a whole lot of such people who lived for stint... killed themselves but lived on forever.....I could just rattle of few such names... Kurt Cobain, Janis Joplin, Jimi Hendrix ...... These are men & women who were born as commodities but went on to become a brand that would never phase out as long as Terra Firma would cease to exist. The icons started a cult that would live on and on.
Bhagat Singh, Sukhdev & Rajguru lived and died for their nation at an age much younger than the ones that have been mentioned afore. Ofcourse they lived on as well.
I felt that I was a part of the cult... thought that I may just end my life sometime soon... this very year was what i thought earlier... rather wouldnt have minded if I did so. Then I saw a few more people around who lived the life to the fullest even in terms of time... Those who wished they could live a little more longer so they could make this world that we live in a better place to live.
I think of that old woman who has a zeal to live who teaches her grandkids the value of livelife in values. Well this is just another woman who doesnt have a face but when questioned why she wanted to live for a few more years says "there is that world , that beautiful world I want my children and grand children and their children to see which I have seen. I need to live because I can give them what it takes them to retain the beautiful world that I have lived in". Here is this woman who no one knows who is unheard of, but she has left a cult back that may retain her beautiful world.
A few incidents in the recent past in the life of the self who had always been thinking that the end is the reality has changed the way how the self looks at things now. I have a motive to live. I have a life to live. I have to give my successors, my companion atleast this beautiful world that I live in.
I must admit that there are four kinds of people who live in this world. Ones who live for short and live on forever, ones who live for long and cease to exit there on, ones who live for short and forgotten an one who live long and live forever towards eternity. But the question comes back yet again what is your age?


Is it Age or Ageless ?

Signing off

and the

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Actor.... Theater... Life

..... In 1993 a few months after people were awarded the best in their categories for their exemplary work in the year 1992 at the "Oscar Academy Awards" a strange incident took place. As heard, A man met his co actor in a gathering and found that the co actor, although not awarded but was still appreciated for his characterized performance and said something to him. Here it is what he said "I heard that you were fantastic son, I am sorry I couldnt congratulate you since I never saw your performance, remember I played a Blind Man". The man who said this was Al Pacino and who heard was Chris O'Donell . The movie in context was "Scent of a Woman". Now that is what I call performance. Al Pacino played Col. Frank Slade in the movie who is a blind man and Chris O'Donell plays Charlie Simms. That is the commitment of an actor as i perceive. Apparently Al Pacino used prosthetic contact lenses so that he could fake his performance.
Well I knew who Al Pacino was from quite sometime, but little did i know about him. Hence I went ahead googling on Al after I heard this anecdote. Lo Behold! what I found was the dearest to my heart. I gathered that Al used to perform in the theater before he moved to the big screen.
Theater is something I believe can produce the finest actors on Terra Firma. I can stand up and vouch for my statement "Actors are from the Theater, Others are mere stars". I regret that I am not a part of that world now. I was though belonging to it in my past. I have been a witness to umpteen number of plays. I cherish every moment of the time that i have been associated with the theater directly or indirectly.
Those movements, the stage occupation, the histrionics, the music, the presence of mind exhibited by the performers, in short every aspect of the theater holds me captive till date. When I started off being close to the theater I had converged my thoughts only towards the point of enacting the roles that were designated to the actors. Little did I know that theater was much beyond the acting as well. Theater has probably been an integral part of every society from aeons probably much before than man could even count leave alone scripting. The local moral stories may have been performed as plays. This kind of an art form is practised in the Management Institutes to an extent till today. Then the theater refined itself to be an incomparable art form. As my quest for knowledge as aligned to theater grew, i can relate that state of mind more to an earthworm. The more you chop the more it grows. Hence I started to be a little more educated on this front. Along with the acting comes a lot more other things. The costume designs, the stage settings , the music that goes with the play, the art direction, lastly the most important aspect of a play, the concept or the plot of the play. Art direction was something that inherited as a learning from a dear friend of mine who had worked for umpteen number of years for "Rangayana" in Mysore. The concept of a play is what keeps the audience ticking.
Has anybody in India ever thought that Seeta may have been thinking about one of the most handsome man she has encountered in her life, Ravana, although she had just caught a glimpse of Ravana in the disguise as an ascetic. Infact, her thoughts about Ravana are instigated by Shoorpanaki in disguise well after the Kind and the Queen started living happily ever after. I just fell off my chair at the end of this play when Seeta actually draws the painting of Ravana impeccably accurate and the painting comes alive. That was the play "Chitrapata" directed by the one of the most brilliant actresses that India has seen "B.Jayashree". I admit that this concept is very radical when the target audience are Indians. So be it. "The Blue Coffee Mug". How does that sound? inane, abstruse, abstract, irrelevant....?? I would advocate it to be a revelation. It was the actors of new genre who came up to put up a play with a phenomenal message that can keep the audience awestruck with their fingers on the nose point. What started of as a comical histrionics by a man who suffered from amnesia, a man who is not grown up to his age and a man who seemed to sensible sent a message to the audience that the riots in 1992 was unwanted, the child abuse around the world and in India is uncalled for. A few of them around me were moved to tears. I have a lot more to say though about the concepts but will stop right here
I very well know that every one in this world knows that there is a difference between the big screen and the world of theater. Ofcourse this includes the fact the there are no retakes in the theater and other mundane stuff. There is more to it. An actor on the stage is actually interacting with the audience unlike the the tinsel town figure. A play like "Maya Seeta Prasanga" which was directed by the most revered entity of the Indian Theater M.S.Sathyu for Rangayana which is corroborated by bringing in the element of "Kathakali" into the play which is a little obscure although not obsolete. The postures in the play enforce that the actors are meant to be statues for the entire duration of the play. Having an audience right in front of you who may not like this kind of adaptation who may even consider it to be some kind of adulteration can always be a taunting one. An actor on the stage has to bear all the tantrums that the audience exhibit and yet come out as a winner.
Oh! I can just keep scribling around her about what i love for ever. So shall abruptly end here. Work is an excuse that I have to get back to....some other time